Lily Hirsch – Medium

Lily Hirsch

Published in
Frazzled

Advice 13-Year-Olds Actually Want To Get From Their Parents

“You’re right… here’s some money.”

4d ago

Advice 13-Year-Olds Actually Want To Get From Their Parents

4d ago

Published in
Frazzled

Parenting Lessons From a Mom in a Spy Movie

Parenting is tough. And it’s a given that your kids are going to hate you. But you can earn their love if you just lead a double life…

Feb 26

Parenting Lessons From a Mom in a Spy Movie

Feb 26

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

What Your Author Photo Says About You

Writing the book was easy compared to marketing yourself as a writer to the masses

Feb 14

Author in front of bookshelves trying to look smart.

Feb 14

Published in
Frazzled

You’re Invited To The Upcoming Junior High Band Concert, Even Though No One Wants You There

Yes, you have to come!

Feb 3

You’re Invited To The Upcoming Junior High Band Concert, Even Though No One Wants You There

Feb 3

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

How to Trick Sport Fans into Believing That You Actually Like Watching Sports

It’s easy if you follow these simple steps

Jan 8

Group of guys watching sports but one obviously doesn’t know what’s going on.

Jan 8

Published in
Frazzled

Fear Me, Ye Mortals, For I, A Mother, Can Summon Illness Simply By Planning A Fun Outing For Myself

I am mighty and all-powerful

Dec 30, 2024

The image consists of three panels: A cartoon woman holding a plate with a slice of cake, saying, “Great to see you!” A middle panel featuring a young woman against a cosmic or magical backdrop with the word “BOOM” in a comic-style speech bubble. A school building illustration with a speech bubble saying, “Come get your kid!”

Dec 30, 2024

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

Dear John, Who Just Tried to Sell Me a Used Toyota Corolla

Sadly, this is goodbye forever so, please, drive away and never look back

Dec 23, 2024

“John” the salesman tries to woo the woman to make her come back to him and the used car.

Dec 23, 2024

Published in
Slackjaw

I, Composer Pytor Tchaikovsky, Always Dreamed Of Getting Nutcrackers And Rats On A Line Of Fancy…

And my plan was simple!

Dec 18, 2024

I, Composer Pytor Tchaikovsky, Always Dreamed Of Getting Nutcrackers And Rats On A Line Of Fancy…

Dec 18, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

What the Weird Reindeer Ornament Your Kid Made Really Wants

To start, a better spot on the tree!

Dec 6, 2024

Photo of a peanut shell Christmas ornament with googly eyes, a red nose, and some sort of maroon bow or decoration on top.

Dec 6, 2024

Published in
The Belladonna Comedy

I’ll Now Take Anonymous Questions From Anyone Who Has Seen Me Running

Be sure to ask about the excessive sweating!

Nov 12, 2024

I’ll Now Take Anonymous Questions From Anyone Who Has Seen Me Running

Nov 12, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

How To Find Stuff When You Are a Kid

Hide-And-Go-Seek-Your-Mom!

Nov 8, 2024

Photo of small girl covering her face with her hands. There is a speech bubble over her head that reads “Mom, can you find whatever is right in front of my face?”

Nov 8, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

A Middle-Aged Mom Fantasy

What a (slightly older) girl wants!

Oct 28, 2024

The image features the silhouette of a couple embracing, set against a pastel pink and purple gradient background. Each person has a speech bubble. The first says, “You had me at ‘go to sleep early and do nothing.’” The second speech bubble reads, “Here’s looking at that new throw pillow you bought, kid.” The image combines humor with a romantic silhouette.

Oct 28, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

Your Kid’s School Announces Its New Line of Shirts

And, yes, you have to buy them!

Oct 11, 2024

The image shows a promotional design featuring a white t-shirt with the text “5th Grade” written on it. Below the text is a childlike drawing of a blue one-eyed bear. Above the t-shirt, the words “NEW ARRIVAL” are written in bold black letters, followed by the smaller text “FROM SCHOOL” just below it.

Oct 11, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

Sorry, Kid. You Can’t Stay Home Alone Until You Can Handle Emergencies The Way I, an Adult, Can.

Your day will come

Sep 25, 2024

A caroonish image depicts a chaotic scene involving natural and man-made disasters. There are birds flying frantically in the sky, symbolizing distress. In the background, there are hills with waves of water rushing towards a house, suggesting a flood. On the right side, a building is on fire, indicating an emergency. A yellow warning sign with an exclamation mark emphasizes danger.

Sep 25, 2024

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

Know Your Rights When You’re Friends with a Writer

An excerpt of some disclaimers and exclusions you’ll find in your contract

Sep 18, 2024

Know Your Rights When You’re Friends with a Writer

Sep 18, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

A Sincere Apology to My 13-Year-Old Daughter for Doing the Unthinkable: Saying Hello to Her Friends

If only I were a ghost!

Sep 3, 2024

A Sincere Apology to My 13-Year-Old Daughter for Doing the Unthinkable: Saying Hello to Her Friends

Sep 3, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

What I Imagine Would Happen If I Co-opt My Teen’s Style and Wear Birkenstocks With Socks

Am I slaying, queen?

Aug 13, 2024

What I Imagine Would Happen If I Co-opt My Teen’s Style and Wear Birkenstocks With Socks

Aug 13, 2024

Published in
The Belladonna Comedy

Good Weird vs. Bad Weird

Bad weird: Starting a new club devoted to tracking strangers’ menstrual cycles.

Aug 13, 2024

Good Weird vs. Bad Weird

Aug 13, 2024

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

I’m the Baby Carrot on Your Kid’s Plate, and I’m Just as Disgusted With Me as He Is

Please eat me and put me out of my misery

Aug 7, 2024

I’m the Baby Carrot on Your Kid’s Plate, and I’m Just as Disgusted With Me as He Is

Aug 7, 2024

Published in
Frazzled

How to Relax and Enjoy the Summer Vibe When You’re a Parent

And, remember, stress will KILL YOU!!!

Jul 24, 2024

Image of woman with her eyes closed, here fingers laced together in front of her face, looking stressed out.

Jul 24, 2024

Lily Hirsch

Lily Hirsch

Lily Hirsch is the author of Weird Al: Seriously and Taking Funny Music Seriously. Apparently, she likes to explain jokes. Ugh.

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